


Hospital

by SecretMaker



Series: Tumblr Drabbles 2015 [49]
Category: Free!
Genre: Angsty fic I have no explanation for, I had to guess on the dates so bear with me guys, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-06
Updated: 2015-05-06
Packaged: 2018-03-29 09:14:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3890821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SecretMaker/pseuds/SecretMaker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I- Just- You see- <a href="http://notsuchasecret.tumblr.com">Tumblr.</a></p></blockquote>





	Hospital

4-24-15

Prompt: Hospital

Pairing: MakoHaru

Rating: T

 

               Makoto woke slowly, the sound of beeping breaking through the haze of sleep. He opened his eyes, only to be greeted by a silky black head of hair. He looked down to find the rest of Haru, curled tightly against him.

 

               “Let him sleep.” Makoto followed the voice to find Rin sitting in a chair off to one side, his thumb holding his place in a book. “He was awake for two days straight. We weren’t sure you’d make it.” That was when it hit Makoto. The beeping machines, the unfamiliar room, the smell of disinfectant. He was in a hospital bed. “You know,” Rin said, drawing Makoto out of his revelation, “I’m not going to lie. I’m pretty fucking pissed at you, Mako.”

 

               “Wh- What happened?” Makoto rasped, amazed at how dry his throat felt.

 

               “What happened?” Rin screeched. Haru stirred in his sleep and both Rin and Makoto watched him, utterly silent. When Haru showed no further signs of waking up, Rin continued in a softer voice, “Haru and I got in on Tuesday, and the first fucking thing he wanted to do was go find you. He was so fucking excited, Makoto, wouldn’t shut up about seeing you again. We get to your apartment and he practically breaks in he’s so happy. Then he finds you passed out on the floor, and we can’t wake you up. God, Mako, I thought you were dead.” Makoto stared at his friend in horror. Rin looked back evenly for a moment, then slumped in his chair. “Do you even know how long it’d been since the last time you’d slept?” he asked. Makoto shook his head. “The nurse guessed five days. Five fucking days, Makoto.” Rin ran a hand through his hair.

 

               “I didn’t realize,” Makoto said slowly.

 

               “I know you didn’t,” Rin said. “You never take care of yourself. Why do you never take care of yourself.”

 

               “Because I’m not worth it.” Makoto wasn’t sure if he said it out loud or not, but the look on Rin’s face suggested he did.

 

               “Okay,” Rin said with a surprising amount of calm. “Okay, I’m not the one who needs to have this conversation with you.” He reached into his bag and started digging around. “I swear, if he ever finds out I know about this, he’s going to kill me,” he muttered, pulling out a slim leather book and handing it to Makoto.

 

               “What is it?” Makoto asked.

 

               “It’s Haru’s journal, and if I ever find out you told him I gave it to you, I’ll never forgive you.” Rin picked up his bag and turned toward the door. “I need to tell the others you’re awake. Just,” he turned back to Makoto, and the look on his face broke Makoto’s heart. “Makoto, promise me something? Promise you’ll read the whole thing, and that you’ll at least try to believe it? He really needs you, okay?” Before Makoto had the chance to answer, Rin turned and left the room.

 

               Makoto looked down at the journal in his hands, something about it tugging at the edges of his memory. He opened it and settled in to read.

 

                              June 30 2004

Makoto says I’m bad with words. He’s right. Grandma gave me this journal so that I can get better, but I don’t think I need to. I told her Makoto understands me. She said that someday he might not. That scared me at first, but I think she’s wrong. Makoto always understands me.

 

               July 8 2004

Went swimming with Makoto today. Just the two of us.

 

               February 25 2005

Makoto says it’s too cold to swim. Took a bath today, then went to the arcade together. It wasn’t swimming, but it was still fun.

 

               August 17 2005

Makoto found a stray kitten in the park yesterday. He couldn’t keep it at his house since Aunty’s allergic, so I said I’d keep it. It didn’t like being inside, though, so I just left food for it in the back yard. Today when I went to Makoto’s for lunch, the kitten was outside his door. I guess it likes Makoto better. I don’t blame it.

 

               November 1 2005

Makoto’s friend died in a tsunami. He’s afraid of the ocean now. I think that’s dumb, but if he’s scared then I don’t have to go to the ocean anymore.

 

               July 5 2006

Makoto wants to join a swim club. I told him it was too much effort, but he said he wouldn’t join without me. I don’t get it. Shouldn’t he just do what he wants, no matter what I think?

 

               July 6 2006

I think I get it.

 

               October 8 2006

The twins wanted to go to the beach today, but Makoto seemed scared. He went anyway. I wanted to swim, but Makoto wasn’t swimming, so I didn’t either. He seemed sad about that. I still had fun.

 

               May 9 2007

People at the swim club want me to compete. Coach says it’s a waste of my talent if I don’t. Makoto yelled at him. I’ve never seen Makoto yell at an adult before. I think maybe Grandma was wrong. I think maybe Makoto will always understand me.

 

               June 15 2008

Makoto said I don’t have to swim in the relay if I don’t want to. He doesn’t get it. I don’t want to swim to compete, I just want to swim with him. And Nagisa and Rin. But mostly him.

 

               December 12 2008

I got a dog. His name is Makkou. It was originally Makoto, but the real Makoto didn’t think it was funny.

 

               August 29 2009

Makoto quit swimming to play basketball. I don’t really like basketball, but swimming isn’t much fun without him, either. I joined the team today. He doesn’t know yet.

 

               April 5 2010

Is it normal to feel warm inside when someone smiles at you? I thought maybe it was just because Makoto makes everyone feel that way, but some girls were saying weird things today at lunch. Kisumi kept making faces and joking about the girls having a crush on Makoto. It was probably just Kisumi being weird anyway.

 

               September 10 2010

Makoto asked me to draw a picture for him to give to his mom for her birthday. When I asked him why he didn’t just give her something he drew himself, he got really quiet. I think he thinks his drawings aren’t good enough, but that’s stupid. I’m not her son, after all. I don’t think he gets how important he is sometimes.

 

               April 20 2011

Makoto wants to join the swim club again when we get to high school. He thinks I don’t know, but I can tell. He misses swimming with Nagisa and Rin. Iwatobi doesn’t have a swim club anyway.

 

               July 1 2012

I think I’m in love with Makoto.

 

               July 2 2012

I am.

 

               November 12 2012

Makoto had another nightmare. He doesn’t know I know about them, which is stupid. He’s supposed to know everything about me, why can’t it work the other way around?

 

               July 5 2013

I almost lost him. He tried to play it off, like it wasn’t as big a deal as it was. But he almost drowned. He couldn’t swim to shore on his own, and when I got him there, he was unconscious. I think I understand how he felt when we were kids. I guess I’ve been a bit stupid. Makoto thinks the best of everyone but himself. He doesn’t understand how important he is. I thought if we just went on like we have been, he would understand, like he does with everything else. But he keeps saying that we have to talk to Rin or he’ll never come back to us, and I think maybe that’s true about Makoto as well. I just don’t want to lose him.

 

               March 3 2014

Goro has been letting us train in the Iwatobi SC Returns, and it’s beginning to show. Makoto seems so much more comfortable these days, like he knows who he is now. I’m glad.

 

               August 22 2014

We fought. We actually fought. I never thought we could actually have a fight like that. But I keep thinking about how he let go of my wrist, how he looked so guilty. He chose a school, but he was too afraid to tell me. He even told Rin, but not me. It’s my fault. I don’t even remember why I let it go so far, why I couldn’t just talk to him. I’m on the plane on my way back to Japan, and I don’t know how I’m going to face him.

 

               April 1 2015

Makoto insists we need separate apartments, at least for the first year. I don’t see the point. It just means he has to get up even earlier to get me out of the tub. He doesn’t mind, though. I don’t know how I got so lucky.

 

               June 14 2016

It’s been over a month since I’ve seen him. Rin and I are on our way back from Rio, and he promised we could see Makoto first thing. I’ve been so busy lately I haven’t even been able to call him. He said he would watch my races on tv, and I’m pretty sure he did because it felt like he was there. Rin said I was nuts, but he’s the one who was sobbing all over me during the medal ceremony after the relay. We’ll be in Japan in less than two hours, and I’m going to ask Makoto to marry me. I should have done it a long time ago, but I still don’t really think I deserve him. I can’t wait to get home.

 

 

 

               Makoto didn’t notice the tears running down his cheeks until one landed on the page. He wiped it away hurriedly, praying it wouldn’t bleed through the paper.

 

               “Why are you crying?” Haru asked him. Makoto jumped and tried to hide the journal behind his back, but he was still to sluggish. He looked down at Haru with a blush plastered across his face.

 

               “I’m sorry, Haru,” he whispered, but Haru just glared.

 

               “Don’t apologize,” he said. He leaned his head against Makoto’s chest and tightened his hold on him. “I’m moving in with you.”

 

               “Haru, you don’t have to-“ Haru cut him off with a harsh glare.

 

               “The doctor said you didn’t eat for two days, and didn’t sleep for five,” Haru said. Makoto opened his mouth to speak, but Haru spoke over him. “I know you were studying, Makoto, your notes were all over the living room. It’s not important, not if you’re going to kill yourself over it!” Haru blushed and hid his face in Makoto’s hospital gown. He mumbled something incoherent.

 

               “Okay, Haru-chan,” Makoto said, stroking Haru’s hair. They lay there in silence for a long time, and if Makoto pretended he didn’t notice the front of his gown getting wet, well, Haru pretended not to feel his hair doing the same.

**Author's Note:**

> I- Just- You see- [Tumblr.](http://notsuchasecret.tumblr.com)


End file.
